Welcome to Bobby's Site
Thanks for Visiting
Some Redneck Jokes:
If the flood history of your neighborhood can be seen on your living room walls…
If people come to your door thinking you have an auto salvage business…
If you've ever spent your entire vacation gone fishing…
If the gas inside your truck's tank is worth more than the truck itself…
If starting your truck involves popping the hood open and keeping a fire extinguisher handy…
If your garbage man is confused about what goes and what stays…
If your legalized will mentions "truck tires"…
If you have no idea how many pets you have…
If your front yard has enough beer cans scattered about to build a jumbo jet…
If you think "Wireless Communication" means yelling across your front yard…
If you have every episode of Hee-Haw on tape…
If you think "taking out the trash" means taking your in-laws out to a movie…
If going to the bathroom at night involves a flashlight and a shotgun…
If you think your dog is "house-trained" because that's the only place he will go…
If your local beauty salon fixes cars and is also a bar…
If the front and back door of your house is the same door…
If you think DVD is a sexually transmitted disease…
If you think that the "Four Seasons" are onion, pepper, salt, and garlic…
If you’re doghouse and your living room are of equal size…
If you and six of your neighbors split the cable TV bill…
If you can outrun the police in your pickup truck, going in reverse…
If your dog has better-looking teeth than you do…
If your front porch collapses and kills ten dogs…
If you only get a shower whenever it rains…
If that billboard that says, “SAY NO TO CRACK” reminds you to pull up your jeans…
If you’ve ever come home and found crime scene tape across your front porch…
If you’ve ever had to siphon gas from your lawn mower to put into your pickup truck…
If you can’t visit relatives without getting mud on your tires…
If you honest-to-God think women are turned on by animal noises and seductive tongue gestures…
If your dog has ever brought home something that you cooked for dinner…
If you have a Hefty Bag for a passenger-side window…
If there’s graffiti on the bathroom walls in your own house…
If your best coon dog gets a birthday present but your wife doesn’t…
If you drive clear across town just to see a car wreck...
If you think a hard drive is driving in rush hour traffic…
If your best sofa came out of a Chevrolet…
If you think a hot tub is a stolen bathroom fixture…
If getting a package from your post office requires a full tank of gas in your truck...
If Jack Daniels makes your list of most admired people...
If you had to hitchhike on your honeymoon…
If you’ve ever changed the numbers on your house so the police can’t find you…
If you’ve ever had a conversation about truck tires that lasted more than an hour…
If your truck breaks down on the side of the road and you never go back to get it…
If your idea of water conservation is moving your Saturday night bath to every other Saturday night...
If your job doesn't require you to wear a shirt to go to work…
If you drive more than thirty miles to save money on a pack of cigarettes…
If the auto junkyard calls you to get spare parts…
If you have cut your wedding cake with a chain saw...
If you hear a siren and your first instinct is to hide…
If you regularly see kinfolks on “America’s Most Wanted” or COPS…
If a tornado hits your neighborhood and does over $100,000 worth of improvements…
If you’ve ever bought a police scanner just to keep up with your relatives...
If you punish your children by taking away their chewing tobacco…
If you stare at a can of orange juice because it says "concentrate"…
If a full tank of gas doubles the value of your truck…
If you win the lottery and buy a double wide mobile home trailer…
If when finally mowing your lawn, you find an engine block you didn't know was there…
If the blue book value of your truck keeps changing, depending on how much gas it has in it…
If the halloween jack-o-lantern on your front porch has more teeth than you do…
If you've ever mowed the grass and found a car…
If you use a toilet seat for a picture frame…
If you thought the Y2K Bug was a new species of insect…
If you thought the Sega Dreamcast was a new fishing rod…
If your 2-year old kid has more teeth than you do…
If you've painted your truck camouflage and now you can't find it…
If you've ever sold your truck for gas money…
If you shop lift from a yard sale…
If there's anyone named Cletus or Clyde in your family…
If the directions to your house include “turn off the paved road”…
If you watch Jerry Springer to see if any of your relatives are on the show today…
If your truck uses more oil than gas…
If you think "harass" are two words…
If you finally mow your front lawn and you find the truck that you thought was stolen…
If you got your truck from a lake…
If you've ever gotten your 4-wheel drive stuck in the mud…
If you were born and raised in a truck…
...You Just Might be a Redneck!
A game of redneck horseshoes (redneck games) A high tech redneck and his palm pilot Finally, a redneck in the white house
Friendly redneck folks here (these guys sure look awfully familiar) Quality entertainment for a typical redneck
